Skunks, Exhaustion, and Urination! Oh My!
When I decided to create this new blog, I figured I would try to make it somewhat interactive with other people because let's face it, who wants to read a blog where I complain about yet ANOTHER spider attempting to crawl through my front door? it's a problem ok
A few weeks ago I took to some of my other social media accounts and asked for situations people would like absolutely horrible advice on and surprisingly they delivered! So to deliver for a promise everyone probably already forgot about, here comes my first edition of Wendy's Advice Nobody Needs!!! all questions are kept anonymous
"How do you deal with stupid meaningless high school drama?"
Ah, high school. I remember the days. The terrible relationship choices. The friendships we thought would actually last for more than a couple years. The Nevada education system. The GLORY DAYS. You know what the cool thing is though? All those things I listed are completely true. Same with your own words. That's the beauty of it all! It's all temporary and meaningless!
"How do you deal with getting sprayed by a skunk?"
Like...don't go near a skunk?
"How do I stop being exhausted by life's never ending-ness?"
Make it fun! Believe it or not, life does end. Enjoy what you can or it will feel like it's never ending! Want to eat an entire batch of brownies for an appetizer and a full container of ice cream for the main course? DO IT. you'll hate yourself and probably cry a bit but DO IT. Especially if you get the coffee flavored ice cream and save some of the brownies to crush them up into little bits before placing them on the the ice cream. Oh, and don't forget the chocolate drizzle. Gotta get that Starbucks drizzle crosshatch. Anyway.
"Should I come back to the bux?"
Speaking of which, hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.
Ha.
"Always pee after sex."
Let's do a little bit of deduction. This was probably meant to be a question, but there was no question mark. Am I to assume this is a question? Am I being told to always pee after sex?
a man sent this in
"Does pineapple belong on pizza?"
There iS NOTHING and I mean NOTHING THAT GETS ME ANGR-of course it does duh to the uh
"How many licks DOES it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop?"
twenty-four
"Does hardship make a person stronger?"
Of course it does. Gotta get those gains BROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
but in all honesty heck yeah, something has to come out of the crappy things life throws at us
we either let them overcome us, or we live through it and that's pretty dang strong pals
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
"How do you get people to see the good in themselves?"
Truth to power? You can't. You know what you can do though? Place them in front of a mirror and slap them while screaming words of affirmation. Works like a charm.
Aaaaaaaaaaand last but not least:
"What do I do if my girlfriend is waaaaaay out of my league?"
............step up your game my man. also call me (;
When I decided to create this new blog, I figured I would try to make it somewhat interactive with other people because let's face it, who wants to read a blog where I complain about yet ANOTHER spider attempting to crawl through my front door? it's a problem ok
A few weeks ago I took to some of my other social media accounts and asked for situations people would like absolutely horrible advice on and surprisingly they delivered! So to deliver for a promise everyone probably already forgot about, here comes my first edition of Wendy's Advice Nobody Needs!!! all questions are kept anonymous
"How do you deal with stupid meaningless high school drama?"
Ah, high school. I remember the days. The terrible relationship choices. The friendships we thought would actually last for more than a couple years. The Nevada education system. The GLORY DAYS. You know what the cool thing is though? All those things I listed are completely true. Same with your own words. That's the beauty of it all! It's all temporary and meaningless!
"How do you deal with getting sprayed by a skunk?"
Like...don't go near a skunk?
"How do I stop being exhausted by life's never ending-ness?"
Make it fun! Believe it or not, life does end. Enjoy what you can or it will feel like it's never ending! Want to eat an entire batch of brownies for an appetizer and a full container of ice cream for the main course? DO IT. you'll hate yourself and probably cry a bit but DO IT. Especially if you get the coffee flavored ice cream and save some of the brownies to crush them up into little bits before placing them on the the ice cream. Oh, and don't forget the chocolate drizzle. Gotta get that Starbucks drizzle crosshatch. Anyway.
"Should I come back to the bux?"
Speaking of which, hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.
Ha.
"Always pee after sex."
Let's do a little bit of deduction. This was probably meant to be a question, but there was no question mark. Am I to assume this is a question? Am I being told to always pee after sex?
a man sent this in
"Does pineapple belong on pizza?"
There iS NOTHING and I mean NOTHING THAT GETS ME ANGR-of course it does duh to the uh
"How many licks DOES it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop?"
twenty-four
"Does hardship make a person stronger?"
Of course it does. Gotta get those gains BROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
but in all honesty heck yeah, something has to come out of the crappy things life throws at us
we either let them overcome us, or we live through it and that's pretty dang strong pals
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
"How do you get people to see the good in themselves?"
Truth to power? You can't. You know what you can do though? Place them in front of a mirror and slap them while screaming words of affirmation. Works like a charm.
Aaaaaaaaaaand last but not least:
"What do I do if my girlfriend is waaaaaay out of my league?"
............step up your game my man. also call me (;
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